Beginning of the Mama Nerd

I am an exhausted and nerdy mama.

I know right?  How typical of me, to discuss being exhausted and being a mom.  So original Julia.  People are going to want to continue reading your blog about how tiring life can be as a mom. Because you know, there aren't already a million people doing the same thing.  Bear with me alright?  I promise you I am interesting.  At least I tell myself that.

I wanted to start and blog and do the thing that all the other mom's seem to do.  After many attempts to start a blog, and show my life as it appears to be (perfect of course! just kidding), and after many failed attempts to muster the courage to put myself out there and write about my experiences, there is one truth that has come forth from it all.  It turns out I am like all the other mom's out there.  I am tired, I am slightly malnourished, my hair hasn't been brushed in 2 days (and that my friends is an improvement), I am late to everything, and half the time I am trying to remember what I have forgotten to do.  10 months ago my life changed when I brought a little human into this world.  My life leveled up, and I became mythic.  Sometimes, it is hard for me to articulate and show people how that change has affected me and how much it means to me.  I know from the outside looking in my life seems perfect, but there are a lot of struggles I as a mom can now shyly admit to.  The real reason why I want to start a blog?  Is to be proud of my motherhood and how that has changed me for the better.

My life has always been a little strange, and our family is not your typical cookie cutter family (although my husband LOVES cookies and tells me frequently how much he wishes we had an unlimited supply).  Motherhood has changed me in ways that I can't just express to someone over the phone or in conversation.  Sometimes it can take me plenty of time and thought into how it makes me feel.  Why not share those feelings, emotions, and sometimes hilarious moments with the internet?

I am also extremely nerdy. I come from a pretty normal family, and so does my husband.  Somehow through time we delved into the nerd realm and found each other.  It wasn't cool to be nerdy when I was a kid, and therefor I was a definite outcast most of my childhood to adult life.  My first true loves were Mario, Zelda, DDR, and Final Fantasty VII.  Now that we are starting our very own family, it is my goal in life to make sure my child carries the nerdom on.  My husband and I have a joke that our son is going to be the one nerd to rule us all.  But that is another topic for another day.

Does this blog have a direction?  I would say no.  I am just going to post when I want about what I want, because well I do what I want!

But seriously I have noticed that trying to be honest and open about who I am and what I stand for, and what my beliefs are has become more difficult as I age.  This year I made a commitment to myself to be more positive by finding something everyday that makes me happy and to take a picture of said happiness on my Instagram (@jaxxylake shameless plug), to be a healthier version of me, and to be more real and up front with my emotions.  So this is me attempting that.  I hope you stay for the ride!

So enough about why I am starting this blog.  Let's talk about my family!

I just recently had my first child.  He is almost 9 months old now.  His name is Justin Jr.  Is it normal to be obsessed with your baby?  Because I am.  I literally want to spend every minute watching and learning about who he is.  The main thing I learned?  My son is a legitimate barbarian.  He likes to smash his way through everything (including learning how to crawl).  He thinks the way to learn things is to push on through until it works.  I am pretty sure he gets that from me.  He also likes to growl.  A LOT.  If this were a pathfinder campaign I would say he was an orc barbarian with all his stats in charisma.  Because you know, he is SUPER CUTE.  Just sayin.

My husband and I met when we were in college but had different love interests at the time.  We met (surprise surprise) at a Dungeons and Dragons campaign.  It wasn't until years later when we were both single that we gave it a shot.  7 years later and here we are.  We have two goofy and loveable dogs Luna (yes from Harry Potter, you really thought I wasn't a fan?!) and Meelo (I wonder if anyone can guess this reference).  Our happy family of five!

Also shameless plug, is the fact that my dogs have an Instagram.  Go follow them now, they are really stinkin cute. @meelolunalove

I leave this blog post with this: I have had many signs pushing me towards this goal of creating a space where I can create and be honest.  At some points this past year, I felt like God was literally hitting me over the head with his vision for what he wants from me.  Yet, I sat motionless, too afraid of the could be and failure.  Life is too short to stand in the corner, and fear change.  Be bold, be brave, and take a chance.

-Jax